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No need for points- this is just a placeholder for my close readings/analyses of poems.

"I'm not much of a poet, nor am I much of a critic, but I believe strongly that the key to writing poetry well is reading it well- reading many different styles, from many different poets, and understanding how their poems are put together. There's far more to a good poem than a rhyme and a metaphor or two.

The poems I pick will not be from deviantART, but from known/published poets (some fringe poets as well as Frost, Williams, Keats, and so forth), though I do plan on doing some dA poetry features sometime.
"

List of close readings so far:
--I. Ars Poetica by Archibald MacLeish: falareste.deviantart.com/journ…
--II. At Roane Head by Robin Robertson: falareste.deviantart.com/journ…
--III. Evening Hawk by Robert Penn Warren: falareste.deviantart.com/journ…

:bulletgreen:Updates every Friday/Saturday.

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and I am back again after an unannounced hiatus brought on by various life issues. I guess, at the risk of sounding like a sorry mess, I'll actually elaborate on what caused the hiatus this time.

The main happenings were school- and mental health-related; I essentially got shoved into a major and career path I detested, and to make matters worse, was pressured constantly on grades by my parents, which of course made me do worse and led to a downward spiral. Following some severe social anxiety and depression, which led to suicidal downs (thankfully, never to the point that I actually harmed myself) and my locking myself in my room and skipping classes for six weeks, I've finally started to get ahold of things, though I'm still working on getting my life in place.

During this time, I essentially shut myself off from everyone, and, worse, stopped writing and reading unless it was for a class. It was a very dumb mistake (that I'd made in the past, too!)- both my writing and my reading abilities decayed as a result, and whenever I tried to make myself write just to write, I wasn't able to do it. I visited dA several times, but could never find anything to say, and felt a lot like a ghost, and ashamed of lapsing yet again. Elapsam semel occasionem non ipse potest Iuppiter reprehendere. Thankfully, I took a sole creative writing class, Fiction Writing I, and partway through the semester, rediscovered the work and writing blog of Theodora Goss- both proved to be lifelines for me in that they reminded me of my love for writing and inspired/encouraged me to pick it up again.

I am now no longer a premed, but an Applied Math major in training to hopefully become an actuary, with a Creative Writing minor (taking Microfiction, Fiction Writing II, and Poetry Writing I this semester). It's a much better spot than where I started, but I'm still wrestling with some inner conflicts. While I like mathematics, I don't like it nearly as much as I do writing, which I secretly hope to make some sort of career out of. I've also noticed as of late that my math classes keep interfering with my writing and other writing-related things I want to do. I can either finish my math homework, or go to a poetry reading. I'll get an idea and want to start writing immediately, but I can't stop thinking about my Statistics homework. It's something every student has to face and slog through, but it doesn't make it any more pleasant.

Then there's the matter of summer internships- I feel rather bleh and anxious about looking up actuarial internships, and would rather spend the summer putting together a writing portfolio, getting involved with the lit community on dA, and interning at a literary magazine, but it's not an "acceptable" way of spending the summer. I also can't seem to connect with any of my math professors, while I get along well with my writing professors, but ultimately, I "need" letters from faculty in math and science. It's disheartening, and the kind of thing that makes me often wonder if my writing is just a distraction I should give up.

Anyway... sorry for the rant. I have been getting more support with my writing, thankfully, and I know for sure that I don't want to give it up (otherwise, why would I be here?). It's just frustrating. But I'm going to try to keep at it, to prevent it from decaying again and hopefully improve to the point that I can start opening some opportunities for myself. I say "try" because, after two long, sudden creative lapses, I've grown to be distrustful of myself.

Between school, extracurriculars, and being a guild officer, I'm not sure how active I'll be here. I won't be able to continue my Close Readings for a while- not just because of the time it takes to write them, but because I've (as ashamed as I am to admit it) lost the ability to write them and it'll take me time to regain it. Thankfully, I can still read poetry and feel it work, but I can't seem to find the words to describe it. I do hope to post a bit on the dA Lit forum, welcome a few newcomers, participate in a few contests, and maybe do some features.

That all being said, here are some happier things that have happened.
  • Though I can't play on the basis I used to in Guild Wars 2, I helped out and eventually became an officer in a guild that's a safe space for LGBTQ players, female players, players from any other group that gets harassed in MMOs, and their allies. I myself now publicly identify as a fringe-ish member of the LGBTQ community (demisexual with strong leanings toward asexuality). On the side, I also mentor new players and occasionally make tutorial videos or lore preservation videos.
  • I spend some Friday afternoons reading to little kids (adorable and excitable, but very energy-draining) and went last week to a poetry reading by C. D. Wright, who read from her book, One With Others, a tribute to her mentor. It was a beautiful experience- at times humorous, at times heartbreaking. I would recommend checking it out, especially if you are interested in the Civil Rights movement.
  • I've also started creating a tulpa, which is basically a sentient thoughtform. It's a hard thing to explain and will likely cause many people to think I've gone off the deep end. If you've got an open mind about it and are curious about my decision to do so, my tulpa (who goes by the nickname "Gray"), and/or the idea behind the process, give these two pages on my tulpamancy blog a read: About Tulpas and About Myself and Gray. (And no, Gray is not a pony tulpa, nor is he influenced by MLP in any way.)
I'll see you around, dA.
  • Mood: dA Love
  • Playing: Guild Wars 2
  • Eating: Oatmeal (for dinner!)
  • Drinking: Water

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Falareste's Profile Picture
Falareste
"Heather Campana"
Artist | Student | Literature
United States
:bulletyellow:
the sun rises in an ecstasy of brightness,
like a lion shaking its mane, like a chrysanthemum
discovering itself

-From Professor Berkowitz Stands on the Threshold by Theodora Goss
-- ~ --

Also known as
Falunel - Tales Forum (RIP)
Silver Halcyon - NaNoWriMo
Falunel.7645 - Guild Wars 2
PM me for my Skype.

My WordPress literature blog - currently redundant if you follow me on dA

I identify as :bulletpurple::bulletwhite::bulletgreen:Genderfluid
and :bulletblack::bulletwhite::bulletpurple:Demisexual

I have a tulpa (non-pony) who goes by the nickname "Gray".
About tulpas - About Gray

Old account --> :iconhalcyonadvent: :iconfalunel: <-- Non-lit account

Personal guidelines for writing poetry
Show, don't tell.
Say more with fewer words.
To write well, read more.
Learn from everything, and keep learning.


Thank You For The... Stamp by Mirz123Reply Comments Stamp by Mirz123Forget Stuff Stamp + PLZ by Mirz123

If I am watching you (either here or as Falunel) and you would like me to add you as a friend, let me know!

---
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:iconallytothequaking:
Thanks for the favorite. "The Crystal Bell" is getting a lot more attention than I thought it would...
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:iconambrosefx:
AmbroseFx Mar 23, 2014  Professional Interface Designer
Know I'm late. Thanks for the watch! 
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:iconfalareste:
Falareste 7 hours ago  Student Writer
Is a pleasure! Didn't know that you were also a sigmaker.
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:iconiago-de-xibalba:
Iago-de-Xibalba Mar 3, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the fav! I appreciate it. :)
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:iconfalareste:
Falareste Mar 3, 2014  Student Writer
My pleasure! It was a beautiful read. :)
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:iconcuddly-cat:
Cuddly-cat Feb 24, 2014  New member Hobbyist Digital Artist
thankee for the llama ^-^
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:iconmoontoon:
Moontoon Oct 13, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for watching!
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:icongliitchlord:
thank ya kindly
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:iconniallcloud:
NiallCloud Oct 1, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for your support by :+fav:ing! It is immensely appreciated!
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:icon20tourniquet02:
Thank you very much for the :+fav:!
It's been much appreciated!:)
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